So instead, I decided to build one. Not a cell phone, but some instrument that would allow me to access my email from a remote location, but without paying for service to do so. This was the beginning of WRATH - Wireless Remote Access Terminal Hardware. You can see an overview of the plan here.
I finally decided on some sort of a PDA that would use, get this, AX25 (or ham radio), to connect to my lan at home. I went with Compaq's iPAQ because of it's HUGE memory of 64MB RAM, and 32MB ROM. The other option was Sharp's Zaurus, but at that time, the only availabe version was the Developer's version, which had less memory than the iPAQ. Also, there is a VERY good following of iPAQ developers that are producing software like madmen! You can find out more information about them at Handhelds.org.
Currently, my iPAQ is running a version of Linux called Familiar 0.5.1 and Opie 1.5 as my gui. I did end up getting the 1GB CF card that fits oh-so-neatly in the dual-expansion sleeve for the iPAQ. Okay, okay, so I ended up spending MUCH MUCH more than the $1000 that was needed for my cell phone deposit, but that's not the point!
As of this writing, wrath's connection to the base station via AX25 is *NOT* yet up. I'm still waiting on some hardware to come in to begin testing.
Check out some of these screenshots of wrath in action.
A HOWTO on installing Familiar, Intimate and Opie on an iPAQ can be found here.

They wouldn't give me a cell phone...
A few months ago, I realized that it would be cool if I could use a cell phone to connect to the internet and check my email remotely. After shopping around for services and a phone, I decided to get one. Turns out, because of my not-so-perfect credit history, they wanted a $1000 deposit before they'd give me service. Well, I just wouldn't stand for that ...err sit.A PDA as a Nameserver